The Girls' Christmas Wish Lists

Like my friend Jamie, I wanted to record the girls' Christmas wish lists. Written tonight, Christmas Eve... (seems a bit late to most, but they are holding out hope for these lists!)



Jena writes:

I want:
1. Chapter Books
2. Littestest Pet Shop
3. Stafft aminals (Stuffed animals)
4. Viteo games
5. Snow hat and glaves (Because she happened to misplace the ones Mommy bought for her last week.)

From,
Jena



Paige dictates to me:

I want butterflies for Christmas. I like unicorns, horses, dogs and cats. I want a golden retriever.

Love,
Paige


Annie doesn't have a clue about what is about to happen tomorrow morning but I am sure she would have placed her order too if she understood!


We've begun a tradition of opening one present on Christmas Eve night before bed. The girls were besides themselves trying to decide which one to choose. So I suggested that they open one from Daddy and Mommy. The girls both opened theirs. They were really excited to see what it was. We'd decided to get the girls their own bible this year. Their bibles have been pretty beat up these past few years. We read the account of Jesus' birth in Paige's The Message Version for 4-8 years olds. In the morning we will read the account in Luke 2 out of Jena's Young Women's Bible. She was really excited about having a bible that didn't have pictures in it!

Beginning the season like this is really important for us. We've cut back on the amount of stuff we are giving the girls this year for many reasons and are trying very hard to instill in them the real reason for celebrating Christmas: Jesus' purpose in coming to Earth, not just a cute story of a little innocent babe but of a Savior that wanted to give up everything He had to live among us and die for us to make a way for our salvation.

We are hoping that this time is satisfying in that despite what we "think" Christmas should be about, we are trying to focus on what His birth on earth really meant for humanity. Interestingly, Paige's bible had a devotion at the end of the story and it asked, "What would you do if Mary and Joseph came to your house that night to birth Jesus? Would you have let them stay at your house?" Then another question: "If you had a chance to see Baby Jesus who would you tell?"

After Duane read those questions, we had a knock at the door, it was almost 9pm! We all looked at each other and Duane said, "What if it is someone to deliver a baby? Should we welcome them?" The girls were speechless. Instead of someone wanting to deliver a baby, it was some friends of our who are really starting to investigate who Jesus is. We've been praying for them and watching what the Lord is doing in their lives, it was such a great moment for our girls to witness. God is really good. Sometimes His gifts come in different packages than what we imagine but we still have an incredible chance to enjoy what He has put in front of us!

From our family, we hope you and your family have an incredible Christmas, celebrating Jesus this year!

Our Rising Stars!

Earlier this fall Jena volunteered in her classroom that she was learning to play the guitar with her dad. Duane had purchased a small guitar just the size for little fingers and he had begun the most patient task of teaching the girls some chords. They love to hear him play and enjoy mostly the chance to sing with him. It just happened to be a few weeks before her class would be learning about music. Their theme would be on different types of music, instruments and songs. Her teacher called to ask Duane if he'd be interested in demonstrating his skills with a guitar and perhaps singing a song for the class.

They chose a song written by The White Stripes and performed here in their own version by Jack Johnson. Jena and Duane worked hard on their song and here is the result.

The class had a time afterwards to ask questions and it soon became apparent that some of these first graders had written their own songs. Unfortunately, time would not allow for them to share their genius with the class. Jena was very proud of her daddy and the chance she was given to sing in front of her class.

For a school assembly this week, she was selected with 7 other 1st graders to sing "Rudolph the Red Nose Reindeer" in front of the entire school! Looks like we have a rising star in our midst.

Sharing the lime light with others may not come easy to her but her younger sister took part in her first performance this week too. Paige's preschool put on their Christmas program this past weekend. Paige was extremely nervous but once she saw us in the audience, she seemed to relax a bit. Not sure if Paige has a future in front of the camera but I was so proud of her! Here she is singing "We Wish You a Merry Christmas!" and demonstrating that she can play the violin. She must come by it naturally, thanks to the musical ability reigning on my mom's side of the family! (Please forgive the camera woman, sitting in a pew with other parents proved hard to get a good video, but you'll get the idea!)

Annie may not sing quite like her sisters but she loves to hum along. She enjoyed both performances given by her sisters. Soon we'll get a chance to hear her words in a song! No doubt she'll have so fun in front of the camera!

What's Your Guess?

Just wondering if anyone out there is reading my posts what kind of baby they think we are having.

Of course, I have my own guesses but I thought it would be fun to get some other input, just to see what the general consenus on our baby is.

Hormone Inbalance

Tears, laughter, joy, fear, anger, rage, smiles, uncertainty...

Do I need to go on?

These are just a few of the extremes I battle every hour. The count down to labor has begun and my body is feeling it. I read an article last night that sums up what I have been trying to put words to: I feel like I am walking around with a bowling ball between my legs. I don't know how it has not fallen out. I will say that 6lbs or 10lbs, it doesn't make a difference. The bending, squatting, tying shoes, picking up a sock that fall on the floor...all these things I took for granted just 2 weeks ago. Mind you, I didn't look very graceful doing these things but I could do them without falling over and crying, "I've fallen and I can't get up!"

Lower back pain has seized me now and I am dying for a trip to the chiropractor or a massage.

I had my exam yesterday and I am at 1 cm and the baby is engaged. The nurse practitioner was really surprised how low the baby was, she could feel the baby's head. "Hmm," I thought to myself, "Do I cry or laugh?" I just stared at her. I am only 36 weeks today and she is telling me that I can go at anytime. She doesn't believe that I will make it to the induction. For this I am somewhat elated. I don't want to be induced. Maybe it is because the first two I had to be induced and for the last one I just want to go when my body is ready. Emotionally, I am NOT ready.

After birth proves to show me that the emotions are the same as before, just more heightened and no one can understand why you are crying over nothing. This is the plight of the sleep-deprived, leaky breasted mother of a newborn.

Ahh, what wonderful things to look forward to!

Joy, unconditional love, fear, more love, kisses, smiles, pictures, some tears...all are awaiting me at the birth of my child. I cannot begin to describe what intensity I am feeling for wanting to hold this new life. To share this intense moment with my husband and to see my children's faces as they kiss their new sibling, makes me cry now.

The Lord is the One holding all this together. The One giving me strength when I am so tired I can't keep my eyes open or continue walking with this little bowling ball between my legs! He is the One who has created this new life in my womb, He chose me to carry this baby and to birth it into the world. I can trust Him for it's delivery and homecoming.

Our Dance Moves

Friends of ourselves made us a video and forwarded it to us. We thought that it would be fun to share. Apparently, word has gotten around that we have the moves! Enjoy!


http://www.elfyourself.com/?id=1239691288

If You Can

"'If you can?'" said Jesus. "Everything is possible for him who believes." -Mark 9:23


In this statement Jesus is answering a father's request for Jesus to help him with his son. This father had watched his son since he was a young child suffer through torment day after day. His son was also mute. The father believed that the boy had a spirit that would try to throw the boy onto the ground, make him foam at the mouth, grind his teeth and go stiff as a board. He also said he has seen it throw his son into fire or water in order to kill him, and he believed that was the reason why his son could not speak.

The man had heard about the miracles that this Jesus was doing. A large crowd had gathered one day anticipating seeing Jesus. When the man heard about it, I am sure that he grabbed his boy and ran as fast as he could to the crowd. When Jesus came upon the crowd, the crowd grew excited. Here the teacher comes, the "miracle man." Many clamored to the front to get a glimpse of him, to touch him, to talk to him, to ask him for healing or blessing.

Then the father could contain himself no longer. He called out, "Teacher, I brought you my son, who is possessed by a spirit that has robbed him of speech." (Mark 9:17) He goes on to explain his son's condition. Earlier he had asked Jesus' disciples to heal him and they couldn't. Imagine the feelings this father was experiencing, "Is there no hope for my son? Will I ever be able to hear him call me 'Father?' I don't want to see him get hurt one more time. It pains me to see what his mother witnesses everyday when she is with him."

Jesus' response seems a bit peculiar.

"O unbelieving generation," Jesus replied, "how long shall I stay with you? How long shall I put up with you? Bring the boy to me." (Mark 9:19)

But looking back at the beginning of the chapter we see that Jesus has just had an amazing time up on a mountain. He was transfigured before Peter, James, and John's eyes. The Lord spoke to them all from a cloud that enveloped them, "This is my Son, whom I love. Listen to him!"

The disciples didn't get what was happening. Peter wanted to build shelters for Jesus, Moses and Elijah who also appeared with them. Jesus swore them to secrecy about what happened as they came down the mountain. Jesus knew that our unbelief can far outweigh our belief. He was sharing his frustration with the people. They didn't understand why He'd come to earth. Their vision, and ours, is limited to what we've experienced not to what we haven't experienced.

Heartbreak and hopelessness almost overcome this father as he sees his boy go into yet another seizure in front of Jesus, convulsing and foaming at the mouth. Speaking up, pleading the words stumble out of his mouth, "But if you can do anything..."

"'If you can?'" said Jesus. "Everything is possible for him who believes."

Everything? Anything? Not just "some" things? But every thing?

Hope rises in the father's heart but he understands the one thing that stands in the way. "I do believe; help me overcome my unbelief!"

Jesus speaks directly to the demon and commands it to come out. He calls it by name, "deaf and mute spirit," commands it to come out and orders it to never return. The spirit shrieked and came out and the boy looked dead. Jesus took his hand and helped him up.

What elation filled the fathers' heart as he held tightly to his son. The son he'd never heard speak was healed. Jesus had given this man his son back but more importantly had given him hope and belief in a Savior who transforms us.

What things stand in our way of believing Jesus' words, "Everything is possible for him who believes?" These miracles didn't end when Jesus ascended into heaven. They didn't end when the last disciple died. They didn't end at the turn of the century.

"Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever." Hebrews 13:8

Miracles, transformation, healing, forgiveness, they can be ours today. Jesus wants us to know the reality of himself in our lives. He is not dead. He is alive and he shows up in our lives when we choose to believe He is who He says He is.

A Portrait of Pettiness

This morning while I was enjoying my breakfast I came across a story in one of my all time favorite collections of books. The Book of Virtues highlights many wonderful classics. Lately, I have been sharing some of the stories with the girls. They really enjoy the stories and it encourages us to talk about the moral or the lesson to be learned. Some are just fun stories but many times, like the one I read this morning, it truly opens my eyes to something that needs to change in my own life.

A commentary from William J. Bennett before the story reads: (pp.215-216)
This tale appears in different versions all over the world, from Sri Lanka to Scotland. This version warns us that pettiness can cause us to forget our obligations.

The story reads as follows:

There was once a young man who was said to be the most pigheaded fellow in town, and a young woman who was said to be the most mule-headed maiden, and of course they somehow managed to fall in love and be married. After the wedding ceremony, they had a grand feast at their new house, which lasted all day.

Finally all the friends and relatives could eat no more, and one by one they went home. The bride and groom collapsed from exhaustion, and were just getting ready to take off their shoes and relax, when the husband noticed that the last guest to leave had failed to close the door.

"My dear, " he said, "would you mind getting up and shutting the door? There's a draft coming in."

"Why should I shut it?" yawned the wife. "I've been on my feet all day, and I just sat down. You shut it."

"So that's the way it's going to be!" snapped the husband. "Just as soon as you get the ring on your finger, you turn into a lazy good-for-nothing!"

"How dare you!" shouted the bride. "We haven't even been married a day, and already you're calling me names and ordering me around! I should have known this is the kind of husband you'd turn out to be!"

"Nag, nag, nag," grumbled the husband. "Must I listen to your complaining forever?"

"And must I always listen to your carping and whining?" asked the wife.

They sat glaring at each other for a full five minutes. Then an idea popped into the bride's head.

"My dear," she said, "neither of us wants to shut the door, and both of us are tired of hearing the other's voice. So I propose a contest. The one who speaks first must get up and close the door."

"It's the best idea I've heard all day, " replied the husband. "Let us begin now."

So they made themselves comfortable, each on a chair, and sat face-to-face without saying a word.

They had been that way for about two hours when a couple of thieves with a cart passed by and saw the open door. they crept into the house, which seemed perfectly deserted, and began to steal everything they could lay their hands on. they took tables and chairs, pulled paintings off the walls, and even rolled up carpets. But the newlyweds neither spoke nor moved.

"I can't believe this, " thought the husband. "They'll take everything we own, and she won't make a sound."

"Why doesn't he call for help?" the wife asked herself. "Is he just going to sit there while they steal whatever they want?"

Eventually the thieves noticed the silent, motionless couple and mistaking them for wax figures, stripped them of their jewelry, watches, and wallets. But neither husband nor wife uttered a sound.

The robbers hurried away with their loot, and the newlyweds sat through the night. At dawn a policeman walked by and, noticing the open door, stuck in his head to ask if everything was all right. But, of course, he couldn't get an answer out of the silent couple.

"Now, see here!" he yelled, "I'm an officer of the law! Who are you? Is this your house? What happened to all your furniture?" And still getting no response, he raised his hands to box the man's ears.

"Don't you dare!" cried the wife, jumping to her feet. "That's my new husband, and if you lay a finger on him, you'll have to answer to me!"

"I won!" yelled the husband, clapping his hands. "Now go and close the door."



Although this seems a bit far-fetched, I find myself thinking back over times that I have been very petty with Duane. Is my marriage really that shallow that I would act like this? I had been struggling this morning with my thoughts over feeling that I was entitled to something, which I see now the Lord used this story to wake me up to my selfishness. It doesn't matter what the silly little issues are over, it is a matter of seeing my marriage for what it is worth. The thieves remind me of what Satan wants to do in our lives, our marriages. God's word says that he is a thief and he comes only to steal, kill and destroy. What ground do I allow him when I act like this?

I don't want my life to miss what fulfillment the Lord wants to bring. I realize that in order to fight the pettiness, I need to be willing to die to myself over and over. My marriage is definitely worth the work and sacrifice that we have put into it and I am willing to continue to fight against what Satan has planned for it in order to honor the Lord.

Late Night Run

So I am 32 weeks pregnant and I have finally given in to my cravings...

Duane is the sweetest husband around, even if he is complaining right now. He is on his way to Taco Bell. Yes, he is making a run for the border for me. I have held out as long as I can. I know he loves me or he would have given me the keys to the car and told me to go myself. He hasn't gone out for just me this entire pregnancy and I think that I have worn him thin. Usually he tells me, "Just sleep it off, Maria." So I try but I still crave something bad late at night. Nothing in the house looked good. I know that it sounds disgusting but maybe just this once and then my mind will be silenced!

Ah, the plight of the husband with a wife with pregnancy cravings...

He is a good man and he deserves kudos for his sacrifice.

Internal Alarm Clock

I think I am beginning to understand what an "internal alarm clock" is.


This morning, I was awakened to my little internal alarm clock. I felt a rush of movement from my little one in utero and woke up before my alarm clock began it's annoying beeping. My little one did a somersault in my belly and I was so excited to feel the baby move like that!

Duane and I had a discussion today about being a woman. He was asking me how I would feel if someone had told me that I could not experience carrying a child after I had already had the experience, if that makes sense. I told him I would be really sad. He asked me to help him understand what it is like to carry a baby inside. It is a tough thing to describe to a man since the only movement he can relate to is his bowel movements! I tried to explain the "butterflies" at the beginning of the pregnancy and then the stronger movements, kick, and flips as the pregnancy progresses.

It is THE most amazing thing I have ever experienced and I started to get sad that this probably will be my last chance to enjoy this time. I am so grateful to have had the chance to carry 4 babies. I have some good friends that will never have that experience. It breaks my heart for them.

What a privilege to be a woman! So often I bemoan my lot in life as a mother, but it is days like today that I can see how fortunate and blessed the Lord has made my life as a woman. So I take encouragement that I have had the chance to experience one of the most amazing events in life!

Dressing Up

Annie was our little lamb. She had a cute little black nose and some small whiskers but I was informed later that lambs don't have whiskers. But still she looked so cute. The other girls each had a chance to wear this costume when they were her age. It has become my favorite over the years.

Paige was a little waitress from Sonic. This costume I am proud to say that I made all by myself! We found the idea in a magazine and we improvised a bit. The tray she is carrying has an ice cream dish with white cotton balls, a red "cherry" ball on top. Behind the ice cream dish is a Coke cup with 2 brown socks and a straw inside. Next to that is a piece of bread, a napkin and a spoon. All were glued to the tray. She chose the fabric and I sewed a pocket and ribbon to tie the apron around her waist. Duane designed her name tag with the "Sonic" label and her name printed beneath. She got a lot of compliments on her outfit! Duane told me that some women even told him that we should make more of these trays and sell them!

"Chef Marshall" joined the festivities too. Jena chose her costume which included an apron, chef's hat, recipe cards, basting brush, whisk and even a french mustache. Duane also designed her name tag which he placed on her chef's hat. Jena had a parade and a party at her school earlier that afternoon. After parading around the playground the students went inside to enjoy snacks and goodie bags supplied by the parents. She had a long day and was very ready for bed at the end of the evening!

Toots and Smiles!

I will clarify this video by including a warning: WHAT SOME PEOPLE FIND FUNNY, OTHERS MAY NOT! We all found this video quite hysterical. Hope you enjoy!

The Salve for Every Sore

Matthew Henry once wrote a commentary of Mark 1:30-34. This passage records Jesus, James, John, Andrew and Simon at Simon's house one evening. These men had just been chosen by Jesus to be among his first disciples. That day they had come from the synagogue where they'd witnessed one of Jesus' first healings. He had healed a man possessed by a demon in the synagogue!

They went home to Simon's house that evening and found that Simon's mother-in-law was in bed sick with a fever. Jesus went to her and took her by the hand to help her up and she began to wait on them! Another healing. Soon they found the entire town of Capernaum at their front door begging to see Jesus to heal their friends and family members! The entire town!

And he does. He heals the sick, those with diseases, those that are lame, blind, deaf, and those who were possessed by demons. Can you imagine what these disciples must have been thinking? "I think we chose the right guy to follow!"

Matthew Henry writes that Jesus' word is a "Panpharmacon- a salve for every sore." He wasn't just a guy that could only heal certain sicknesses. He healed a myriad of ailments, diseases and demonic possessions.

Jesus easily could have said a blanket statement like, "Be healed." and then gone back inside to rest for the evening. It had been a long day. He had stepped into the role as Rabbi at the synagogue before the man with a demon spoke out against him. He was teaching the Jews with authority about the scriptures. Everyone was amazed at his wisdom and teaching ability.

But instead of thinking about himself, Jesus chose to get personal with each one who needed healing. He wanted to touch each one. He wasn't offended by the man with leprosy, his open sores oozing puss and everyone around him keeping their distance. No, he looked the man in the eye and laid his hands on him and healed him. He knew this man and dozens of others needed his touch. He wanted this experience to be personal. He knew that their testimony would be, "The Lord Jesus healed me. You knew what I suffered before, now look at me and see what He did!" Jesus wanted the friends and family members that brought their sick and lame to him to be touched too. It wasn't enough that these people sought after him, he wanted them to know that they'd found him!

Satisfaction rested in Jesus' heart being in the midst of that crowd. He loved people and he wanted his new disciples to see that. He wanted them to see a radical way of relating to and loving people.

Alone, his word brought healing. A salve for every sore. I have been touched by him.

Last week, I was driving home after dropping off my daughter at school. As I turned on to our street my vision began to leave, I was getting a migraine. Instantly, I turned off the radio and prayed, "Oh, Lord Jesus, will you come and heal me of my migraine? You know all the things I need to do today and my children that I need to care for."

I called a friend and my husband and asked them to pray for me. I laid down on the couch and closed my eyes. My girls just stood around me watching me, waiting for me to get up and do something. I tried to explain to them that I couldn't see them, I don't think that they understood though. I had an OB appointment and blood draw in less than an hour and the way this was progressing I was thinking I wouldn't make it. I called my husband to see if he could come home to drive me since I couldn't see and he tried to convince me to cancel my appointment. I told him I would consider it and I would call him back later. I got up off the couch to "see " if I could find out what time it was. As I began to walk, I started to see a little bit better. With each step my vision returned! The Lord had healed me! With my migraines, I am usually out for 6-7 hours in a very dark room, vomiting and begging for relief from the pain.

I could see and I didn't have any pain! I was able to make my appointment and drive myself!
How good and gracious the Lord is to me.

Psalm 107:20 says:
"He sent forth his word and healed them..."

My panpharmacon healed me! His touch is personal. He wants to look us in the eye and allow us to experience him in an intimate way. His word is the salve we need for our wounds, sores, sicknesses, diseases and our loneliness. Allow Him to show you how he wants to heal you. Ask him, this time he is the One standing at your door waiting for you to open it and see Him.

85 days and counting...

Eighty-five more days or so until I can bring another child into this world!

Amazing! That is not that long from now and usually I go early so it could be less. But it helps to put my life into a better perspective as far as how much time I have left until life changes once again. Soon a little 7 pounder will demand all of me!

The baby moves a lot now. This time I have a better understanding of what is going on and really enjoy watching this little one move around. The girls ask when the baby will arrive, if we've chosen a name and what is the sex of the baby. I cannot answer any of their questions.

Complete strangers give me their take on what we will be having. I've heard, "Oh, it's time for you to have a boy!" "Your poor husband, he needs another man around the house." "Oh, you are soooo having another girl!" "You can only make girls, huh?" "If you have another girl will you keep trying until you have a boy?"

Whether or not this is the last pregnancy for us, we want to relish this time. Duane loves to listen to my belly and the girls get so excited when they can feel the baby move. It is incredible to share this with them. I am so grateful that the Lord chose us to care for this little one. We continue to remind ourselves when we get overwhelmed that we have tools in our family that this little one needs and the Lord is not going to leave us to do this alone! Thank God!

Couscous and Tantrums

The other night I made a delicious meal! I say that because I was getting tired of the hum-drum of baked chicken. I wanted to "spice" things up and make something different. Never mind that this meal did not get finished until almost 7pm, it just ensured that everyone was EXTREMELY hungry and ate very well.


At a bridal shower of mine, my mother asked everyone to come prepared with a favorite recipe to share with me. A good friend of the family brought a recipe from her stack. Her husband had grown up in Morocco as a missionary child. But she had also developed a love for authentic Mediterranean and Asian food growing up. Her recipe was entitled: Lebanese Chicken. I remember thinking, "Wow, I don't think that I will ever make this, I don't even quite know where Lebanon is, I think it is a small town south of Columbus but I am not sure." Anyhow, I have carried it with me these past 8 years always skipping past it in my recipe box.

About a year ago I found it again and thought that I would try it. It called for couscous. I didn't have any so I purchased some and made sure that I had all the ingredients that I needed and decided to prepare it for the family. The chicken was a hit, sweet and tender and the "best chicken I have ever tasted Mommy," the couscous was a flop, "What is this? It is dry and yucky." The girls said something similar, that was Duane's response!

Have you ever tried couscous? It generally picks up the flavor of whatever it is near, quite like rice but just a different color (yellow) and a different texture (small and round.) Duane made it very clear that he didn't want it ever again! Jena and Paige tried it and basically said the same thing. I, on the other hand, fell in love with it. Maybe it was the craving or the desire to "try, try, again" with the family but I made the couscous again.



Everyone turned up their noses but Annie. She loved it and begged for more and then begged for some more. Honestly I was getting a bit stingy with her because I wanted to keep most of the couscous for myself. But secretly I was excited that at least someone in the family liked it, even if she doesn't have any words and will eat almost anything in front of her! Although the photo is a bit blurry you can see the bits of couscous on her hands and face. Pure delight!



Several nights later as I was preparing another delicious meal for the family. Ha Ha! Another secret sandwich recipe...Wednesday youth group night... Annie was busy singing near me as I prepared the food. She knows several songs but her favorite one right now is one she has made up all on her own. The words aren't that hard to learn so I will try my best to convey the essence: "Mama...mama...mama..." It is the most beautiful song I have ever heard and will treasure it always. She adds different keys and dance moves each time but the meaning conveys her heart for her Mama and I LOVE IT!



Anyhow, I thought, "How nice it would be to record this moment and show her later on how much she loved her Mama and how stinking cute she is when she sings. I will record her without her noticing." So I quickly grab the camera and begin recording and this is what I got instead:

What began in song ended in tragedy. Her mama didn't have her heart anymore, she made that very clear after the camera was turned off. Nevertheless, I got a few seconds of sweet Annie and then many longer seconds of not-so-sweet Annie. We are in the 20th month of her life and it seems conceivable that the "Terrible Twos" are upon us now.

We have the good moments and the ones we'd rather not dwell on but either way we have them and have to live through them. I am thankful that these days are upon me right now!

Reinforcing the Truth

Isn't the Lord good?

This afternoon, the girls came in from school and had their snack. Then they plopped themselves in front of the TV for a little quiet time. They turned on the Family Network and began watching a show with Mary Lou Retton. A character on the show was having a hard time forgiving someone that had hurt them. Mary Lou encouraged the girl to forgive even when it is hard. She stressed that when we choose not to forgive we not only hurt the other person but we hurt ourselves too. We are filled with anger and not love. The rest of the show was about the girl choosing to forgive the other person and building a bridge in their friendship and honoring what the Lord would want her to do.

Jena looked at me and I just raised my eyebrows. I think the conversation we'd had earlier returned to her mind. I asked her, "What do you think about that Jena? Isn't that what we talked about this morning?" She said, "Yes." I could tell that she was relieved that she had made the decision to forgive.

What a great God we have!

The Pain of Unforgiveness

"Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing."

Those are the words of Jesus as he was crucified on the cross. He said these words to show the depth of his love for those that crucified him and for us. But have you ever considered the impact of these famous words? I think that I have had a glimpse of the impact just this week.

It is really easy to read these words that Luke pens in Luke 23. But to say them aloud is something else and to believe them from your spirit is not something that is easy to do. When we consider the times that we've had a decision to forgive someone or to hold onto our unforgiveness it brings us a bit closer to the cross.

Often, I find that it is really easy for me to say these words of forgiveness and it isn't always the case in really believing that I have forgiven. But I find that truly releasing my unforgiveness brings a deeper understanding of what Jesus meant. He said these words for us. For our benefit, we are forgiven for the sin in our lives but also it teaches how to release others too.

My daughter Jena has had a really rough start to the school year. She has been bombarded with one situation after another whether it is a sickness or something involving another classmate. She has been having a bad week this week.

She came to me earlier this week complaining that her stomach hurts. She has been battling this for several weeks now and I have adjusted her diet and tried to make sure that she is getting enough rest. When I ask her what she thinks is causing her pain she tells me that she doesn't know. Duane battles IBS and I have often wondered if she will too. It pains me to think that she is only 6 and already having troubles.

Every day this week, I have dropped her off at school and she has walked into school crying. It kills me to see her like this but I know that I cannot keep her at home just because she doesn't feel like going to school. She has begged me to home school her but I don't have peace about that. I know that the Lord made it very clear to us that this is where she needs to be.

She had an incident earlier that involved two of the boys in her class chasing her and her friends at recess. I encouraged her to confront the boys and she did and they left her alone. But on Monday morning, she came to school to find that her seat had been moved and she was at a different table. She had been moved away from one of the boys and placed right next to the other one. She told me one day that it really bothered her that the boys talk about poop and pee all the time and they have rude manners. I explained to her that is how some people are. I asked her if she had asked them to stop. She said that she would. So the next day she did and he agreed to stop talking like that.

But then the next day it was a story about the other boy. After I dropped her off in tears again, I began asking the Lord what was the root of her sadness each morning. I felt him respond that she wouldn't have all her stomach problems and sadness if she would choose to forgive these boys. I was shocked by His response. But the more I prayed about it the more it made sense. I have had several instances in my life that I can see that physically I changed as a result of unforgiveness.

I approached Jena and asked her if she had forgiven the boys. She said that she hadn't. I told her that I had been praying for her and shared with her what the Lord had told me. I told her that it had to be her decision to forgive that I couldn't do it for her. I waited on her for a while. I reminded her several times that I was would pray with her when she decided.

We battled all morning today. She was sobbing at breakfast that she didn't want to go to school. I talked with her about it and even reminded her about a song we'd learned several years ago. Proverbs 17:22 says, "A cheerful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones." I explained to her what the verse meant and how I believed that her stomach aches would quit when she forgave these boys. I shared with her that there are people in every one's life that they don't necessarily want to be around or even like but the Lord puts those people in our lives for a reason. Many times it is to change us, not them.

Finally on our way to school this morning, Jena told me that she had told the Lord that she wanted to forgiven them. I prayed with her and told her that she needed to remember all day that she had chose to forgive them and sometimes it would be hard to stand next to that. She teared up again once we got to school but I am praying that the Lord will give her strength to make it through her day and that she can experience some joy.

I am excited to hear how her day went today. I know that she can experience freedom in all this. My tendency is to shelter her but I know the dangers of that and I trust that the Lord is with her all day and I know that He makes His presence known to her. She tells me that He does. As we grow in parenting we find peace in knowing that we are not in this alone, the Lord is walking this road with us.

Play time!

The other evening we took the girls to a nearby park to let them expend some of their pent-up energy. They always love going to this park and the night was beautiful.

Annie tries so hard to keep up with her big sisters. She wants to do the same things that they are doing and usually has no fear when it comes to trying new things.

Hence this video:

The night was getting dark fast but the video had us all cracking up. Annie was very anxious to get down this slide. I think that she wanted to race Duane down the slide. Sorry for my giggling but it was too funny to see her try!
The park also has a pond with lots of ducks. I had been saving some old bread and brought it along for the girls to feed to the ducks. Annie tried really hard to feed the ducks but she decided that she liked sampling the bread more than sharing.

Jena and Paige appear fearless too when climbing all over the equipment. At one point I heard Jena yelling for me and I found her hanging upside down on some rings. It was a great moment because I remember that feeling when I was younger. Certainly if I weren't pregnant I would've shown her what her old woman could do on the rings too! Jena has certainly proved that she is all monkey this past year and isn't afraid to show her skills. Paige on the other hand is a bit more tentative. She will watch Jena do something and then try to convince herself that she can do it too. With A LOT of coaching on our part she eventually will do it too. Nonetheless she still enjoys playing around and climbing up the climbing wall.

Later on, Jena yelled that she was going to go down the tunnel slide backwards. She came flying down the slide on her back with her head first. She couldn't stop herself and fell on her head. She just got up laughed at herself and went back up to try it again! Not the case with Paige, she would have given up and wanted to go home.

I must admit that sometimes I would rather be a bit more relaxed and not be such a mama bird! Here Duane caught me in the action of being protective.

It sure is good to see the girls enjoy themselves and I think that Duane and I did too!

What good can come of this?

It is 2am and I cannot sleep.

I have been the recipient of a horrific case of poison ivy. I received this "gift" almost 2 1/2 weeks ago and the past 2 days have been the worse. On Monday I bought a small bottle of 100% tea tree oil and applied it to my wounds.

That night I broke out into a rash all over my belly and neck. The next two days I spent trying not to scratch at the rash that may have been a reaction to the tea tree oil. It has gotten so bad that my ears itch. Now that is pretty pathetic.

On Wednesday I called my primary care physician to beg them to call in something to release me from my pain. But they wouldn't. They claimed that they were too busy to see me and maybe I needed to call my OB. I had already called my OB and they said that if it got any worse I should see a dermatologist. So I did what anyone else would do in my situation. I began to cry.

I was on my way to drop off Paige for preschool. I dialed Duane's office and told him the conversation I had with my doctor. He was gracious enough just to listen. The night before I had shared with him that I just wanted him to listen to me and offer sympathy. I knew that he couldn't do anything to heal me or fix me, I just needed him to listen. So that is what he did. Then he suggested that he would call my OB's office to see if they'd give me a referral to a dermatologist.

After I hung up, Paige asked, "Momma, why are you crying?" Obviously my attempt at trying to hide my tears didn't work. I was honest with her and told her that Mommy was pretty sad that she felt this way and wanted it to go away. Then she asked me, "When is Jesus going to heal your legs?" I didn't know what to say to her.

We got a call back later that day that my dermatology appointment would be on Friday morning. But it was Wednesday. Duane saw my look of desperation and asked, "Do you think you can make it till then?" I responded, "Yes." What else could I say? In the light of what others I know who are suffering, this itching is nothing. It could be constant pain. I am thankful for that.

So to survive the past two days I have been taking Benadryl around the clock and applying the strongest cream that I can find to my patches of poison ivy.

In my times of desperation when I am crying out to the Lord I hear Him remind me that His grace is enough and my weakness can become His strength. But the one thing I am learning is that my complaining gets me nowhere. I quietly bite my tongue when I think I cannot handle another itch and ask the Lord for His strength to ignore it. Sometimes I can handle it and other times I find that I can't.

Hence the reason that I am up at 2am. I woke up clawing my legs trying to find relief. Then began the itching on my arms. I used to believe that itching meant that things were healing, now it means that things are spreading. Duane was amazed at how bad this is getting when he saw my arms earlier today.

I am reminded of a passage in 2 Corinthians 12:8-10 (New International Version), Paul is addressing an issue that he had been dealing with, his "thorn in the flesh."

Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.

*************************************************************************************

So this is my prayer now. It doesn't seem like that big of a deal in the light of what Jesus did for us but I know that the Lord uses situations like this to draw us closer to Him. Poison Ivy might just be that thing that the Lord uses in my life to teach me about depending on him.

Lord allow Jesus' power to rest on me. Teach me how to delight in weaknesses. For when I am weak, then I am strong.

Apple Bobbing & Birthdays

This past weekend we hosted a party for 4 of our friends who all happen to have birthdays within a week of each other. We all have been wishing fall would arrive soon and so we decided on a fall theme for the party.

We grilled chicken kabobs and began a fire on the gas grill! Everyone was gracious enough to pick apart their chargrilled tomatoes, pineapple and peppers. For dessert I made some homemade pies. Pies always signal fall to me. I wanted things to be a little bit different so I thought an apple and pumpkin pie would suffice.

The ladies had a chance to open their gifts and many expressed that they felt it was like Christmas. It is so fun to see mothers get to enjoy themselves and not have to work so hard on their special day.

After the gift exchanges, we headed outside for a little apple-bobbing contest. Many of the children hadn't a clue what was about to happen but they were excited nonetheless. We decided to have the youngest child go first. Hindsight shows that maybe Kenton needs to remember what his age is before pushing the little children out of his way!

But it probably was neccesary to teach the children how to bob for apples. He freaked Annie out when he pulled his head out of the water. Little Norah was excited to try next since she was the youngest. Then came Paige, she was pretty nervous and got a little scared but she gave it her all.

Judah was very enthusiastic about getting his apple. He didn't hesitate to put his head in the water, just like his daddy. Most of the little children had a hard time getting an apple, but they enjoyed their attempts. Jena dove into the bucket holding her nose! We were all laughing at her because she had a hard time getting an apple. On her last try later on she did score her apple. Kate and Maddy were next. Maddy stick her whole head in and drenched herself!

Payge was the last one to try and she did a great job, especially since many of them hadn't tried this before. They all had such a great time, it was fun to watch them. Wendy, David and Rachel all gave it their all too:A tradition has begun among us and we are all looking forward to the next fall activity!

Just In Case You Were Wondering...

Just in case anyone has been wondering what to get us for the new baby, I thought that I would give some ideas. Since no one out here knows what "OSU" really stands for, let me enlighten you. "OSU" stands for "Ohio State University."

I was really excited the other day when I pulled into a parking space at the pharmacy right next to a car with bumper stickers proudly exclaiming: "TBDBTL." Of course no one here would know what that acronym means, but to those of us who "bleed scarlet and gray" it warms our hearts.

Brutus Buckeye is the mascot. He is a giant nut. I understand that it seems silly to some but not to those of us from the state shaped like a heart. All this is making me really miss "The Heart of It All." What a better state motto than, "Kansas, it is bigger than you think."

I wish there was a way to make music play while you are reading this blog, you'd be enjoying, "Hang on Sloopy" and dying to see "TBDBTL" (the Ohio State Marching Band) perform "script Ohio" what a sight. I say this because my uncle was a part of the prestigious band when he attended OSU.

Fall always reminds me that the Buckeyes will be entering a new football season and all those who live in Columbus get a little crazy with "Buckeye Fever, " just ask David and Jenny, right guys? Jenny's father is one of the biggest fans I have ever met and it makes me smile to think that he is gearing up for another season too! Love you Jeff!

GO BUCKS! GO BUCKS! GO BUCKS! GO BUCKS!