I am having a hard time trying what to decide to do with this blog. I'd love to update it weekly but I feel like I don't have much that's really worth writing about. I can't update everyday, there's a ton of activity going on around here and little people get extremely jealous of my time in front of the monitor. Although school is about to start and I can foresee having a bit more quiet time, I think there are better ways for me to spend my time than writing about the dribble that comes to mind throughout the course of my day.

With that in mind, I think I'll let this blog morph into what it will. Idealistically it will become a hot spot and people will be encouraged and uplifted by reading the words on the screen but more realistically, there will just be empty words unless the Lord chooses to do something with these seemingly meaningless thoughts.

So read on if you will...

A passage from the Bible continues to come to mind over the past few weeks and I feel that the Lord must be trying to get through to me about something. Problem is: Maria is no Bible scholar. Heck, I don't even understand who wrote the books, when they were written and who the audience was. My bible isn't a study bible, it is just a plain simple text thin-lined bible for simple people, mainly the reason I was drawn to it. So I'm trying to make sense of this strange passage. I know in time revelation will come but until then, here's my short take on what I'm reading through.

Normally I read out of the NIV or The Message versions, again, simple words for a simple mind. But today I was looking for a bit more insight and pulled out the Amplified Version. I turned to the passage from Joel chapter 2. From what I understand about Joel, he has received word from the Lord to plead with the Jews to repent and return to the Lord. He warns of impending judgments from the Lord in response to their sin.

Joel 2:12 reads:

Therefore, also now, says the Lord, turn and keep on coming to Me with all your heart, with fasting, with weeping, and with mourning [until every hindrance is removed and the broken fellowship is restored.]


A commentary by Matthew Henry suggests:
Our business therefore on earth must especially be, to secure an interest in our Lord Jesus Christ; and we should seek to be weaned from objects which will soon be torn from all who now make idols of them. There must be outward expressions of sorrow and shame, fasting, weeping, and mourning; tears for trouble must be turned into tears for the sin that caused it. But rending the garments would be vain, except their hearts were rent by abasement and self-abhorrence; by sorrow for their sins, and separation from them.

I began to wonder about my own life. What objects in my life have I made into idols? Are my tears over my own sin or for how now I'm left to deal with the affects of my sin? How often do I fast, weep and mourn for my own sin? How do I rend my heart?

I recognize that Jesus has taken sin away from me by His death on the cross but shouldn't that make me more aware of my own sin? Shouldn't I understand the cost He paid to save me from spending an eternity away from God? Sometimes I wonder if I truly understand it all.

God calls to people all over the world to turn and keep coming to Him with their entire heart. He wants "every hindrance removed" which means that nothing stands in the way of surrendering our life to Him. His greatest desire for us is to have our "broken fellowship" with Him restored. The next verse states His response to us when we turn to Him:

Return to the LORD your God, for he is gracious and compassionate, slow to anger and abounding in love, and he relents from sending calamity.

My biggest prayer is now that I will start to grasp what the Lord is trying to show me in this small passage, that I will respond to what He's saying, and that my heart will be rent or torn for those who are in a broken fellowship with Him.